30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 7, What does this mean?

Lisa's inspirational quote today is simple:  Go gently. 

I choose the simplest one of her prompts on that theme: 'Going gently, for me, means...'

My immediate thought is, someone famous has said something intriguing on that subject, and I look it up.  It's a Dylan Thomas poem that begins:

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."  (quoted in the spirit of fair use)

It is Dylan Thomas, who reportedly wrote this in a villanelle, written as his father lay dying, a poem that says to me it's ok to be angry about faculties declining as one nears the end of life.  An exhortation to push back against death...an analogy, at least in my mind, to the way outdoor flowers seem to bloom their hearts out as the summer ends, and fall sets in in earnest.  Or is it an intense, urgent encouragement -- to give it your all, not give up, never say die?

While that's not exactlyl what going gently for me means, I could definitely imagine a gentler way of dying, of helping a person live through their last minutes.  Gently asking about pain, about soothing, about kind memories and soft singing, favorite songs, happy, peaceful memories shared, scripture, song...a hug or a chip of ice...the presence of someone who cares...

Or going gently might simply mean tiptoeing around a nearly-sleeping baby, turning the radio or tv down when others are otherwise engaged nearby.  Saying, Let me help you with that, or presenting flowers or an unexpected gift, thinking before speaking, slipping into a seat at church in the last minute, walking back to the pew after communion...Sitting still to listen, look, be mindful of whatever is nearby in time of space: silence, people, art, music, wind in trees, shadows on buildings, shapes and colors of plant and flower, song and swoop of bird.. Thinking before speaking.  Going gently....

30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 6, Oh, well, hm, I guess I can do THAAAT....

By now we (I-me? Distraction number one, thinking about doing instead of doing! I should use an 'I', really) can see that this month is about motivating one's writer self to 'move off the dime.'  Yep, by yesterday I was telling myself, 'You know, Shirley, probably the biggest problem is procrastination.  So instead of wringing hands over it, you need to name and tame it, and the things that distract, and get over it/them (or, most probably, the right phrasing is, get over yourself.)

The inspiration Lisa quotes today is by Leonard Cohen:

“Ring the bells that still can ring 

Forget your perfect offering 

There is a crack in everything 

That's how the light gets in.”

 Hm, why am I referring to myself with the editorial 'we' so often these days. Instead of over analyzing (distraction number one again), what's interesting about that, let me rather make a plan and move forward.

Distraction number two, a close relative of number one:  perfectionism.  Come on, admit it, how many of us can be first, best, every time?  And who is going to notice the little flaws and scratches one tries so desperately to hide or deny? Get over it!  Move ahead!

Let us, okay, let me let some light in:  I choose to answer today's challenge to
Make a list of 10 things that you can offer right now, imperfectly. 
Yeaaaah, I guess I can do that!  Things I can do imperfectly include:

meet my husband's expectations
bolster the self concept and attitude of my children and Grandchildren
make chocolate chip cookies
remember family and close friend's birthdays.
speak Telugu
publish my writings online.
walk comfortably
keep in touch with friends
visit or gift someone with time, food, a book, companionship for an hour or two
wake up on time
get enough sleep
papercutting art

Ohhh, can I ever do that!!?!  I could go on and on.  But I"ll stop for now, and make an imperfect attempt to do some of today's cooking before family come for a five day visit, and be thankful.

30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 5, Turning It Outward

Hmmm, all of this so far seems rather self-serving.  Today's inspiration and prompts by Lisa ask what I am committed to,  As I look at who and what feed my spirit, I see an embarrassment of riches.This week I came across a note from a study I did several years ago, using Julia Cameron's book THE ARTIST'S WAY, in which note I shared some of the things that inspire and delight me: (to be added here)

And of course people have especially enriched, empowered, encouraged, and enabled me along the way.  At the risk of omitting a great many of them, notable are my parents, my grandmothers, Sister Placid, a Latin teacher, a missionary met at Bible Camp, my high school music teacher, bff girl friends in high school, college and among my teacher (career) friends, a pianist, a social worker, Mother Theresa, Jesus and his friends, a retired school principal, students, neighbors and friends at church, parents' friends. international friends, a nephew, my husband and children and grandchildren,  a volunteer counselor, a change mentor, writing instructors, mentors and peers.  From time to time I have listed these friends and encouragers in more detail, sometimes in a prayer list, often naming them in meditating on the formative influences in my life, always thankful to God for them.

And now Lisa suggests enlisting an 'advisory' group composed mostly of artists, musicians, and _____  This I have done, several years ago.  Although only a few consider themselves creatives, they all possess a certain appreciation and zest for life as it is lived, and actively relate to and encourage others.  We do not meet as a formal entity, and few of them know each other.  But they hold me to the intentions I have expressed to them
with listening ears, periodic checks on whether/how I am working on goals, and/or showing an interest in my process and/or 'products.'

I am truly blessed, and thankful for each of these people and more.  As I said, an embarrassment of riches of friendship and encouragement along life's way.  Recalling them requires examining myself.  Do my efforts deserve all this affirmation. Do I give them feedback. Do I do my part in response. THAT's what my mission in life appears to be:  to encourage, affirm, and model a positive attitude toward life and people. In regard to journalling (and hundreds of poems, a handful of essays, and nascent play and memoir), the big question is, does my writing do that???  Let me re-examine and turn outward (shape and share) what I can.

And am I overdoing this journalling...this page has taken over an hour...Is it the best use of my time?  I hope it has at least refreshed my mind and my thinking...

30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 4: Where am I going and how do I get there?

Hmm, I thought Lisa would ease us into 'practice' by tossing out situational anecdote starters, and we would be off on a storytelling lark.  Journal.  Storytelling.  What's the difference?  One could tell stories in a journal, if those stories are the thoughts-of-the day, but the focus of a journal, if one can generalize--given what follows in this sentence--is more of, like, what-I-think-today, right?

Today's prompt starts with an Inspirational quotation:

“To practice any art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow. So do it.”  (Kurt Vonnegut said that.)  followed by several prompts, of which I choose the sentence starter, "It makes my soul grow by…"

which pretty much answers my questions, where am I going and how do I get there?  I never thought of it in Vonnegut's terms, but I do know that writing makes my spirit soar...even when I'm writing schlock or drang (I think that's the word, for woe).  I always 'get into it', and time disappears (as my spouse and children will no doubt vouch.)  So, yes, I aim to feed or debrief my spirit, and I must agree, despite my irregular practice of it, that the practice of writing is one important way of accomplishing that. (Other ways that work for me are song, time with family, helping others, reading, walking and talking with good friends, and, most importantly, worship.) (and even the mundane, when it 'clicks': cooking, and laundry )

And so yes to spirit, yes to writing, yes to the practice of writing.  Even badly...which I think my babbling in these first four days of the challenge has been.  Skills and routines can become rusty; I know mine have.
On the one hand these four days seem like a spinning of wheels, i.e. going over and over the same, in fact a priori, discussion about the value of , and my intentions for, keeping a daily journal.  On the other hand, I acknowledge that  stating one's intentions, especially when sharing that statement with others, provides a stronger motivation to keep on going.  Momentum. Keeping this blog alive. And having done it every day proves that it has, and can be done.  All of which feeds the spirit,  Yes, I can.

So let me do.

30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 3: "That said..."

Okay, yesterday was confession time. Today it's examination time; self-examination, that is. But Lisa doesn't suggest sitting down and looking into onesself intentionally at this point. Rather she encourages journalers to 'just write' and see what comes out on the page; that, over time, certain images/themes/(and may I add, styles) will repeat themselves.  These, then, will be what to examine further at some later date.  Don't try so hard to analyze what you're writing as you go along.
She also suggests visualizing a tree, every part of a tree, and choose which part of 'my tree' seems most significant at this time. (This assumes that we can 'own' her version of visualizing our own lives as trees.)
(Oops, that WAS a bit of analyzing wasn't it. Furthermore, it illustrates what may already be a theme of
scattered, or shared, perspective. In the foregoing paragraphs I veer from Lisa to the omniscient 'we' to
myself.  Hmmm...)
But, to take Lilsa's suggested image, and her prompt, vis  :If I committed to tending the roots of my experience by journalling for 30 days, then...   I must expect, there will emerge themes and  constructions that are my particular 'style.'  Whee, what a boon this will be for the obligatory 'author bio' statements expected by magazines and public reading venues.  I would be more productive at my desk, besides being freed to write freely, elsewhere.  I could be modelling the fun of writing for my grade school children. And my habit of writing would become more relevent.

30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 2: I, Shirley Smith Franklin, do take this challenge.

Day 2, August 2, 2014

Recognizing the value of making a commitment (it increases productivity and promotes persistence), Lisa today challenges journalers to make and/or respond to the idea of, an intentional commitment to the month-long-journal project.  (Ooh, that was a mouthful...)

How do I feel about making a commitment to this 30-Day Journalling Challenge?  I must admit that there
is some trepidation.  What's in it for me?  Will I spend to much time on it every day?  Who is Lisa, anyway?
Is this just a ploy to attract more subscriber/readers for her blog?  Will the practice actually help me become a better, more poersistent, regular, and productive author?  What if I just give it a shot, and if I don't get around to it, or like it, I can quit?

Ah, there you go...quit before you don't succeed.  How's that for avoidance??

No, I will continue to honor a new year's resolution I made two and a half years ago: to follow through and carry out stated intentions.  This is my intention, and this is my commitment.  I will write every day.  Whenever possible (!!There you go again)...I will answer one prompt every day, early in the day, to the best of my then ability.

That said, Lisa quotes,  

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way.”

W. H. Murray said that. (In his book, The Scottish Himalayan Expedition)

I believe, and have experienced that to be true, a version of  " give and it, and it shall be given unto you, full measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over shall be poured into your lap." (That's from the Bible...I promise to look it up and duly record the reference.  OK, here it is:  Luke 6:38)

Yesterday I asked why do I delay.  Lisa challenges me/us to name the obstacles.  I do...and the list disappears into cyberspace.  Let me try again, in a rapid replay:  other people and priorities, not journaling first thing in the morning, household tasks, compulsive reading rather than writing, forgetting or fear of forgetting a 'gem' I want to record, wondering whether journaling is going to be worth it anyway (I have decades of journals on a shelf, more unfiled...will I or anyone else ever get around to reading them?), eating, correspondence on paper or email or messaging with friends and family, the phone (eschew it, yet am unable to stem the flow of an overpowering, frequent, caller), in a word, distractability.  Need to nap, tired eyes...Or is it just lack of commitment.  Very puzzling that I can often be so laggardly at doing the very thing I want to do, even though in the Bible, too, St. Paul puzzles the same way...

Lisa, I appreciate your efforts, and those of other friends, to keep trying.  And so, Lordwilling, I will.  I should be glad for the luxury, really, of having such distractions.  May I offer up this month of dedicated jounaling as an offering of thanks!  

Here we are again! 30 Day Journal Challenge, Day 1

Day One, August 1, 2014

Welcome back to walk along with Winnie the Pooh and Piglet, friends in a thoughtful, slow, and hopefully enjoyable month-long blog focused on journalling.  This month I'm going to share my responses to at least one a day of  Lisa Sonora's ROOTS: 30-Day Journal Challenge prompts.  She's encouraging people to take up the journalling practice; I'm dedicate this month to greater discipline in my writing habits.  You can just write along on your own, or join the challenge at http://www.lisasonora.com/30-day-journal-project You need to subscribe to her blog to get the emails...and can unsubscribe if you decide to discontinue after August.  Note:  It is free, and the commitment to do it is voluntary.

The first day's prompt challenges us to think about beginnings.  You might write about a specific 'beginning' in your life.  I have enough to say about beginning per se.

I am better at most beginnings than endings.  I may procrastinate indefinitely before choosing a class, leaving the house for church or any other reason, or some mornings, simply getting dressed and presentable for the day, unless I have definite idea for how/where it's going to go.  Once I do, then, watch out:  I will enthuse about a new class, buy new materials even though there are plenty of unclaimed folders etc at home, collect new friends at a party or event, collect and set out ingredients hours and days before I actually get around to making dates to meet, or baking something.

It's follow-through I'm concerned about.  Why do I lollygag along the way?  Why do I sign up and/or start
more classes and projects (making paper, paper cutting art, sending birthday cards, buying and saving clothes for just that bit of tailoring that will make them fit, promise get-togethers with neighbors, elderly and/or newly met international women than I can actually carry out?   Why do I have years of notes and intentions for poems, stories, and a play without getting around to publishing or staging them?

Slowly but surely, I'm learning ways to 'move off the dime.'  Not the least of which is responding to challenges, like this, which nudge me along in the right direction:, toward completion and closure. Another help is enlisting several friends as an 'accountability group.'

Let the challenge begin.
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